A New Life Of Sorts
by WolfWarriorz
Summary: Set in Buffy, Season 7. Buffy is mortally injured by a demon, there is only one way for her to be saved, and even then, it's not really being saved. Buffy must come to terms with her new life - sort of. Spoilers! Spiffy.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: SPOILERS! For all seven seasons of Buffy, and maybe some for Angel, too. I haven't seen all of Angel yet, but I do know that Spike comes back (whatever, that's lame, much as I love Spike, that's just dumb) and I am blissfully choosing to ignore that fact. Okay. This is set in Season Seven Buffy, AU, right before The First starts to really control Spike- before he kills/turns anyone. Giles came back with Willow because he should have, and no potential slayers were brought. I know this has been done before, and I'm not very original, I admit, but I hope to later put a spin on things to make my story unique. Ummm... There will be lots and lots of Spiffy (mostly called Spuffy as I've seen, but I like Spiffy better) and probably some REALLY bizarre crack pairings (ex, Angel/Giles or something just as two were just the first thing that popped into my head -I'm one sick puppy- and I have no current plans to write anything containing...er...that. Just so you know.) Lastly, reviews ALWAYS appreciated, even if they're a measly "good. keep going." or a discouraging "you suck. shut up." Either way... Okay, enough rambling (I have a Buffy complex when it comes to talking too much) and here's your first chapter. Enjoy! Or don't.**

Giles, Willow, and Xander were gathered around a pile of books at the magic shop. "Giles...You mean to say that when we...when we brought Buffy back, we also made this "First" thing?" Willow asked, her voice a little panicky.

"It appears so...Well, except for the part about us "making" the First. The First Evil has been around since forever. Before forever. That is why it is called the First." he murmured, cleaning his glasses unnecessarily and staring at the ground. he had long disapproved of how cocky Willow had gotten with her magic, and how the affects just kept cropping up again. Yet he said nothing. Xander failed to crack a joke for the first time in a long while.

Willow dropped her head in her hands. "God, what have I done? I yanked her out of heaven, and now I'm putting everyone in hell? I- I thought I was just bringing her out of whatever hell dimension she appeared to have dived into.. But I should have known! I should have researched, figured out more things! But no, not Willow Rosenburg..." she said all of this with her face still hidden, her voice muffled and warped. A tear slipped through her fingers and splashed silently onto the floor.

Their thoughts were interrupted as one big combat boot kicked open the door. Spike, in his typical leather jacket, stood in the doorway. His hair was rumpled and blood dripped from a deep scratch on his cheek, falling onto the blade of an ornate battle ax, strapped to the inside of his jacket. But none of the Scoobies noticed any of that; they were more focused on what was in the vampire's arms: Buffy.

Her shirt was in shreds, revealing the three parallel claw marks that ripped open her abdomen. Blood kept pouring out of the wound, and she had many more than just those; a deep bite had taken a huge chunk of her arm, and she was bleeding from more wounds that decorated her body more abundantly than baubles on a Christmas tree.

Spike, out of breath, rasped, "Demon! Don't know... what type.. She.. she was patrolling... coming back here, to the shop... She.. got jumped... And I didn't get there...before.. this..." His eyes were wide and feral and the pain there... He laid her on the table.

"Is she...?" asked Xander, not wanting to know the answer.

Spike leaned slightly closer. "Her heart's still pumping.. But it's very faint. We have to do something! Fast!"

"C-Call an ambulance?" said Willow hesitantly, her eyes still wide with shock and her voice thin.

Spike whirled around and snarled, "It's too late for that! They'd never make it in time!"

"What else can we do?" Xander said very faintly, staring at Buffy's still form.

Giles spoke for the first time, slowly articulating. "There's nothing we can do. But we might still be able to save her... Sort of."

"Spit it out you ponce!" snapped Spike, trying to stem the flow of blood from the gashes in her stomach.

The Englishman said lightly, as if he couldn't believe he was saying the words, "You have to change her. Make her a vampire, Spike."

Willow broke in. "Would she want that?"

"Over being dead? Even in heaven...she can't leave us, not with this new evil "First" thing. Change her." Xander told the vampire he so despised.

"You're sure? All of you? 'Cos you're taking the ruddy blame when she..." Spike trailed off.

Giles dipped his head in determination. "Do it. Now. Before it's too late."

Spike pushed the shoulder of her decimated shirt down off of her arm, and hesitated. "Do it!" Xander said in the background, and so he shuddered, canines elongating and his eyes turning yellow, and he bit Buffy's neck. His razor-sharp teeth sank easily into her throat, and the blood still in her body coursed through the arteries and into Spike. He drank, drank until she had just the right amount of blood left. His body longed for more, but he knew he could not drink. Her blood, so sweet, made him evil side blink open its eyes, but he shoved it away, and focused on saving the woman he loved.

"Get. Me. A. Knife." He spat to the humans behind him, his hand outstretched, impatient. Almost immediately, he felt the cool handle in his palm. He used the black-handled, newly sharpened weapon to slice his arm open, the skin splitting like two pieces of fabric with the seam pulled out. He put the wound to Buffy's mouth, and, as soon-to-be-vampires did, she drank. She sucked the blood from his arm like it was water after she'd been stranded in a desert. The Slayer drank until he pulled away, feeling quite faint. She probably hadn't needed as much of his blood as was given, but it hurt him to deny her what she wanted; anything she wanted. After one feeble motion as if to pull him back, Buffy Summers fell asleep on the table in the magic shop, her wounds slowly knitting, and her whole world changing; forever.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: It's semester exams week next week, and if I don't want to retake Earth Science or Algebra next year, I actually have to study for these bad boys (oh darn). not to mention debate meets this Saturday and the next! Ugh. Why am I telling you this? Because I'm probably not going to have time to be updating this (or any of my other stories) very readily until they're over. I might be able to squeeze in one or two but they're not exactly going to be popping out every hour on the hour. Just to warn you. Now, here goes Chapter 2! **

Buffy opened her eyes. She was in her bed, at her home. So why was everything different? Things seemed sharper, more detailed. Sounds rang clearly through the house when she might not have heard them before; she swore that was the sound of someone clicking through channels on the TV. Scents whirled through the air, stronger than she recalled. Scent. What _was_ that smell, a fragrance that made her stomach clench and her mouth grow damp with saliva? It smelled... It smelled almost like...No.

Steps approached her door, familiar steps. As her door handle turned, Buffy resisted the strange urge she felt to hide. But she held herself in place, sitting up in bed, and wondered just what exactly was going on. Spike entered the room, and didn't look at all surprised that she was up. His eyes were gentle, but oddly wary. "How are you, pet?" he asked, his gaze searching hers. What did he know? Buffy wondered, sensing that a lot was amiss, and Spike was in on it.

"I think you know the answer to that better than I do. What on earth is going on? Why...Why do I feel...?" she let her sentence hang, but she needn't have finished it.

Spike let out a small sigh. "Buffy. I'm going to tell you what's going on. Every last detail, I'd swear t' it. Just.. wait until the end to start punching me, right?" Buffy's feelings of trepidation grew stronger with his little speech. But she nodded, promising. "Okay. Where to begin... Well, it the sun's barely gone down, and I feel something. A twinge, a tingle. I know somethin's up. I head to the first place that comes to mind; The Magic Box. I can't be more than a hundred bloody meters away from it when... When I find you. There's this demon guy, standing over you, got his claws all in your belly, his ugly face biting into your arm. He's torn you up something awful already, and he got to me, too, before I could figure out how to kill it; one of those you can only kill by taking their heads off. You're on the ground, blood everywhere, he'd obviously taken you buy surprise, so I pick you up, and take you that short, short distance to the Magic Box. You're barely alive, bleeding, guts fallin' out and other such niceties." his voice breaks and hitches, and he pauses to take a deep, unneeded breath before continuing.

"I take you in the Shop, and put you on the table. You're close, too close to dying for doctors- even if they had arrived immediately, which they wouldn't have, they probably couldn't have done a thing. So Giles... Giles told me to change you. Willow questioned him, and so did I, mind, but he and Xander... They wouldn't, couldn't just let you lay there and die.. Not again. And remember, it's not exactly like it would have been a picnic for me either! I love you, you know that. So.. I did it. Turned you into a vampire." he ends his story and looks at her, trying to gauge her reaction.

"I...I'm a vampire?" she asked slowly, sounding both awed and somewhat bewildered.

Spike dipped his head. "M'Fraid so, love."

"A can't get staked in the heart, will blow up in the sunlight, blood drinking, cross-fearing vampire?" she said, her voice slightly dangerous.

Moving ever so slightly to block the door, he said lightly, walking on thin ice, "Well aren't we Miss Glass's Half Empty? Sure, being a creature of the night has its downsides, but it's not all bad. We can sense more, feel more, run faster, fight harder..." He leaned against the door, eyes cautious and drinking in her every twitch.

"Let me out. Let me out or I'll go out the window." Buffy said sharply, eyes narrowing.

Her sire shook his head in a derisive but resolute No. "You can't. Daylight. And you don't have the key anyway." he nodded to the metal that blocked any vestige of light from outside. "Can't let you out like this, love. New vampires... They can be a bit unstable. A lot unstable sometimes." As he let the last words escape his lips, she flew at him, trying to punch him in the face. He quickly deflected the hit, and she felt a funny jerk in her stomach. When he touched her...

Memory came rushing back to her; she remembered the taste of Spike's blood, saw the faint line on his arm that confirmed it. She remembered the taste, and how he had let her drink so much, so so much. She remembered how she felt her human life draining away... And she put his hand to her heart. It was still. Dormant. And only now did she realize what had been so blindingly absent that she couldn't see it; what had really clued her in to why something was off. Her heart... It was dead. Like her.

Curling his fingers around hers, he whispered, "I know. I miss it, too." Buffy removed his hand from her unbeating chest and shivered slightly.

"I want to see them. Dawn. Willow. Giles. Xander." she told him simply.

He let out a small sigh. "Well, you don't seem to intent on drinking their blood, but you are a vampire, and you could be lulling me into a false sense of security so you can drink them. But I thought you'd want to see them. I'm going to chain you to the bed. Sorry, but it's necessary."

Buffy challenged him with a glare. "I've kicked your butt any number of times before Spike. Just try it." She took a step back as if preparing to fight him. Deftly, he stepped forward and grabbed her right arm. She tried to hit him with her left, but found herself feeling that bizarre protest in her midriff again as he ducked and grabbed her other arm. "Why can't I hit you?" she hissed in frustration, glowering as Spike merely smirked.

"Well, love, part of it is that you're a new vampire and I'm more'n a hundred years older than you. And part of it is that I'm your sire. You can still hurt me, sure, but it's weird, like you're hurting your aunt or something. Not that i'm like your aunt... Oh, bloody hell. Never mind." He chained her wrists to the bedposts before standing back to admire his handiwork.

Raising an eyebrow, Buffy warned him jokingly, "Don't get any ideas." Spike flinched and gave her a pained look before striding out the door, presumably to fetch the others.

"Buffy..." came a familiar voice a half-minute later. "How long has she been awake?" asked Giles. Buffy couldn't hear the reply, but it didn't matter. Giles came forward to where she could see him. "Buffy. How are you?"

Grimacing, the new vampire asked, "Is that a rhetorical question? I'm a parasite." Giles chuckled while Spike protested from the corner of the room.

"Don't go dissing the species, pet!" he exclaimed, offended. Dawn, Willow and Xander stood silently near the doorway, Dawn's face especially wary.

Buffy started to roll her eyes, before a sudden thought struck her. "D-Do I have a soul?" she mostly addressed Giles and Spike, thinking they would know best.

"That," Spike said before Giles could open his mouth, "Is a question we don't know the answer to. But you could, seeing as you haven't tried to kill anyone yet. Well, besides me, but that's always been a funny habit of yours. Anyway, this could all be a devious plot, so we don't actually know if you do or don't."

Shooting a dirty look at the vampire he despised, Giles asserted, "There _is_ a way we might be able to tell." Seeing Buffy's questioning and slightly hopeful gaze, he continued. "Angel."

Spike groaned. "Not bloody peaches! I've had enough of that poof for multiple lifetimes."


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Yay it's chapter three! Thank you for reviewing, youliveanduburn & JGK200! Much obliged ;)**

Buffy slept through the hours it took for Angel to arrive in Sunnydale. Spike watched over her, partially to make sure she didn't break loose and kill everyone, but also so that Angel didn't try anything funny when he arrived. Spike didn't trust the poof with anything, especially not the girl he loved. Too soon, Captain Forehead arrived and burst unceremoniously into the room. "You!" he snarled when he caught sight of Spike. Closing the space between them with a step, he swung his fist as hard as he could, slamming into his Grand-childe's face and causing the other vampire to crash into the wall. Spike let him.

Buffy woke immediately, sitting up and absorbing the scene in front of her for a second. Angel had grasped Spike by the throat and held him to the wall. The somewhat younger creature of the night didn't struggle or try to escape, merely looked into his grand-sire's eyes, his own unreadable for once. "Angel, stop." commanded Buffy, not knowing if he would listen, and very aware of how vulnerable she was, shackled to the bed. His face vampiric, he released Spike, who crumpled to the ground. Thrusting his hand into his jacket, he pulled out something sharp and wooden, approaching Buffy's bedside.

Looking up to see the stake in Angel's hand, Spike yelled, "No!"and scrambled to his feet. Angel rose his arm, ignoring the look of terror in his ex-lover's eyes. Not knowing if he would make it in time, Spike launched himself across the small room and on top of Buffy. Instead of removing vampire Buffy from the world forever, the stake sank easily into Spike's flesh. With a gasp of horror, Buffy stiffened.

"Spike!" She expected for there to be nothing but a scattering of dust on her, but somehow, impossibly, he remained solid. With a low groan of pain, he stood up.

With an effort, he smirked at Angel and taunted, "You missed, Peaches." Giles burst into the room, awakened by the yells. "You might want to clear out." Spike warned faintly, "Angel here just tried to stake Buffy. Almost got me, but missed." He reached around his back and pulled out the stake, cursing loudly. He gripped the bloody weapon in his fist, blood dripping down his black shirt.

Giles stepped back instinctively, and muttered darkly, "Angelus."

Angel whipped around to face him. "Giles, it's still just me. But that is not Buffy. That is the shell of her, with a soulless demon inside." Spike chuckled weakly at Angel's words.

"You can be really bleeding stupid sometimes, you know that, Peaches? That _is_ Buffy. As I am William. Even before I had my soul, when I was evil? He was always there. He's me. Just, er, slightly modified. Less nancy boy talk and all that rot." Spike sat down on the edge of Buffy's bed, closing his eyes and stemming the flow of blood from the wound. Angel appeared to relax the tiniest bit with Spike's wise words.

Giles, speaking cautiously, stated, "Angel. The reason I called is because I know you can sense if creatures have souls, and we don't know if Buffy does or not."

"You mean.. There's a chance?" said Captain Forehead, and Spike rolled his eyes.

"Well, yes. I mean, maybe. See, there's no record anywhere of an ensouled vampire changing someone. Or about the Childe of such an occasion. Though truth be told, there aren't that many ensouled vampires in the first pl-" he broke off when Angel held up his hand to stop him.

Looking very dangerous, he gritted his teeth and asked in short, hard sentences, "_Spike_. Changed. Her!" his last words changed into a snarl as his face once again morphed into its vampiric state.

Hopping off the edge of the bed, now ready for a fight, Spike asked incredulously, "You mean you didn't know? Yeah, I was the one. I was the one who was here to save her life- again. And I suppose since you didn't know, you came in here and attacked me just because you felt like it? Bloody hell. Now will you just see if she has a soul so you can leave? Hate to break it to you, Peaches, but after this welcome, we're not really clamoring for your company."

Angel glowered at him fiercely, obviously trying hard to restrain himself. "And if she doesn't have a soul? You just gonna keep her on a leash, like your pet? That's what you're always calling her, isn't it? I bet you'd like that, eh, Spike?" deliberately being cruel to the vampire he had hunted with for so many years, the elder bloodsucker started to stare him down.

"No. If she doesn't have her soul, but wants it, I will tell her how to get it back. Been there, done that. It wouldn't be a bucket of fun, sending her off to face the trials, but I'm not about to deny Buffy her own soul, now am I?" he countered Angel's argument smoothly. "Now would you just cut to the bloody quick and check for souls in her body already? Save the let's-torture-Spike fun fest for later."

Rendered speechless by his unexpected reply, Angel put his hand to Buffy's chest, where her heart once beat. Spike fingers twitched, the smallest wisp of jealousy in him as he remembered how not too long ago, he had had his own hand there. After waiting for several moments, he looked back at Giles, brow furrowed. "I can't tell. She's too emotional- sad, confused... If she were happy, I could tell, but given the circumstances..."

Buffy rolled her eyes and, in a faint attempt at being her old self, protested, "Sitting right here..." This made Spike smile a tiny bit, but mostly he was concerned over if she was soulless or not.

"Make her happy then. So you can tell." Giles said impatiently, which was out of character for him.

Angel leaned over and before even Buffy figured out what was happening, Spike said loudly, "Just a minute, Peaches!" Angel opened his mouth to tell him to stop being jealous, but Spike interjected before he could get a word in edgewise. "Ask the bird's permission before you get all snoggy! She's got a right to be warned that you're about to put your slimy mouth on hers."

Not expecting this, Angel simply asked, "Buffy?"

"If this helps you find my soul..."she trailed off. Not needing telling twice, Angel pressed his lips to hers in a fervent kiss. Spike flinched and clenched his fists, jealousy now snarling inside him. He shoved it away. This wasn't about him. It was about Buffy.

Buffy broke off the kiss by turning her head, and Angel hesitated before holding his palm against her heart again. Looking a little offended and a lot surprised, he looked at Giles. "No change. She's as melancholy as she was before."

Before Spike could make a gibe about Angel losing his kissing powers, Buffy murmured his name. His name, after she had just kissed the great poof! Wait- did this mean, did she mean she wanted-? He didn't let himself think it, because that would lead to hope, and hope... Well, for him, hope usually led to disaster. "Spike... Spike, kiss me."

Had he imagined her say it? No, he couldn't have- why else would Angel have exclaimed, "What?" and looked at him in disgust. It was Angel's reaction that made him respond. "Naff off, wanker." Angel, surprisingly, silently got up and moved away, evidently accepting rejection. About bloody time.

Spike pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, and held her face in his hands. She relaxed a little bit, looking at him through her long eyelashes. She leaned toward him, and he slowly closed any remaining space between them. He touched his lips to hers, and then they were moving in unison, and Spike pulled her closer, careful not to put strain on her wrists, tied up as they were. He kissed her passionately, yet he was no more than an equal partner. The kiss might have lasted ages had Giles not coughed pointedly and loudly. They split apart, Spike looking deeply into her eyes as he stood and walked away, giving room for Angel to test again.

This time, he felt whatever he had been trying to. "It's there. She has a soul. It's still Buffy." Breathing a sigh of relief, Spike moved around to the other side of the bed to sit by her.

Spike murmured softly her name, "Buffy..." Angel reached up as if to unchain her hands, but Spike caught his wrist in the act. "Not so fast, Peaches. She may have a soul, but she's still a new vampire, and having just had a bunch of my blood...Well, she could still be very volatile." Turning to face Buffy and releasing the older vampire's arm, he smiled apologetically. "Sorry, love."

Buffy shrugged. "S'alright. I get it. I have a soul!" she said happily, smiling at her sire, who smiled back just as brightly. Angel looked at how they stared at each other, and made a small noise in the back of his throat.

"Guess... Guess I better be off so I can get back before the sun rises." he muttered before walking out again. Giles, with an awkward nod to the pair of them, followed suit.

Spike sighed and said, "Speaking of the sun, I need to get you some blood- from my crypt. Promise you won't try and eat anyone?" he teased, his face a mask of seriousness.

Playing along, Buffy sighed and reluctantly replied, "Fine..." but her act was broken when she smiled at the end. "Besides, I'm so tired right now, even a bit of rope would stop me, let alone these big chains. Why am I so tired, anyway? I haven't done a thing."

Spike explained, "Dunno why, really, but most new vamps take a while to get to their full strength. They're completely tuckered out for the first bit. So you sleep now, and I'll be back with some nosh." Buffy dipped her head in assent, but before he could get up to leave, Buffy planted a quick kiss on his cheek. She smiled embarrassedly and laid down to sleep. Spike covered her up with the flowery duvet, wondering what had made her change her mind about him.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hello all! Sorry about the wait :( Been velly busy. And I'm afraid i'll be quite preoccupied this weekend, so it may be a few days before number five appears. Oh well. A thousand bazillion and four thanks to loslote and Cherryll, who reviewed, and just as many to illusera and brumleygirl8389 for putting this story on story alert, and staralinga and brumleygirl8389, for listing this as a favorite story. I also thank everyone I haven't before for reading my story. You guys are all great! :D**

The next few days passed in a a blur. Buffy remained tied to her bed while Spike brought her blood due to the fact that she was taken over by blood lust the first time she fed after being turned, trying to escape. Her friends and sister visited daily, and when the better part of a week passed, it was ruled that she was safe enough to untie, as long as her sire was in the vicinity. Now was such a time, six nights after Buffy became a creature of the night.

Spike came back into the room with a steaming mug. "One cup of Piglet, love." She pulled a face at the gross analogy but took it all the same. He sat next to her on the bed, where she practically inhaled the snack. She handed the glass back to Spike, who wrapped his long fingers around the handle and set it on the nightstand.

"Thank you." Buffy said softly, talking of more than the meal. She leaned into him, and he stroked her hair lightly. She turned her head to kiss him, but he shifted backward with a very troubled look.

"No, Buffy. You don't owe me anything. I saved you because I love you, not because..." he trailed off awkwardly but continued after a pause. "I'm not going to take advantage of you because I sired you. If anything, you should hate me. I took you away from heaven... maybe forever." He dug his fingernails into his palm at the realization. "Bloody hell...You're a vampire! The eternally damned! What've I done?" the horror in his eyes grew and grew.

Buffy shifted closer, taking his head in her hands. "Spike, no, listen. I'm glad. I am happy you made me a vampire, instead of letting me die. I'm going to live forever, so I don't have to worry about going to hell. And you wouldn't be taking advantage of me." She took his hand in hers and squeezed it.

Standing up quickly and pulling his hand out of hers, he "No. What I said still stands. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve you. I- I can't." he swallowed, running his fingers over his head in confusion and frustration. He left the room, facing away, but not before she could sense the pain he was feeling.

As Spike jogged down the stairs, he heard Giles call loudly to him, "You might want to stay where you are." Muttering darkly, he ignored the old man's advice and came down into the living room. A young woman stood near the door, her hair a deep black, and as he came into view, she started to draw something from her hip holster. "Spike... Meet the new Slayer."

"Hold on. What're you doing here, Slayer?" Spike asked the woman.

Speaking with a light accent, she replied, "My job. There are vampires, lots of them, here. In this town, which is a Hellmouth, in case you haven't noticed. Now be a good vampire and let me stake you." At that moment, Buffy came down the stairs, her face vamped out.

"Not so fast." She stalked down the last few steps, cat-like, and saw the flair of recognition in the new Slayer's eyes. "Wondering how you know me? It's from your Slayer dreams. I was the last. And you are not about to kill Spike." The dark-skinned girl cocked her head to one side.

"You are not the previous slayer. She was a brunette. Taller, too. Tattoos? She killed herself. And you're a vampire. You are not her." Still, she seemed confused.

Knowledge flared in Buffy's eyes. "Faith! Hold on.. Faith.. She killed herself? My God..." she shook her head, breathing in air that she didn't need. "Look, Spike and I have souls, wahtever-your-name-is. You can't kill us. Besides, I was a Slayer. With Faith."

"And just why should I believe you? Believe that you two both have souls and are good vampires?" she asked, chin up defensively.

Spike rolled his eyes exasperatedly. "Why else haven't we eaten you yet? There's two of us, and I'm pretty experienced. Why else are we both in a human's house? Why else didn't Giles (this guy)" he nudged him with his elbow, "run when he heard us coming? Or even when he saw Buffy's vampire face? And why else was Buffy in your dreams?" he smiled triumphantly.

Her brow furrowing, trying to find a loophole, she shrugged. "I suppose it's possible... Hey, you were in my dreams, too... Just once."

"Well, there you have it then. Er, what was I doing?" Spike asked wondering.

A tint of red appeared in the Slayer's cheeks. "Well, Faith was in her body..." she motioned to Buffy, "And she.. umm.. She said some things."

The day coming back to him, Spike stammered, "Oh. Oh yeah. Uhh.. New topic.. Bollocks.. Er, what's your name?" Buffy, looking mischievous, started to ask what exactly Faith had said to him, but she didn't even start, wanting to hear the new Slayer's name.

The Slayer, now slipping the stake back into its holster in a sign of trust, studied him carefully. Her dark eyes flashed in the dim lamp light as she replied, "I'm Kennedy."


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Once again, thanks SO much for everyone who reviewed or put this on an alert of any type. Also, I'm sorry it's been so long since I updated, but I've had a terribly busy last couple weeks, as I had a State debate tournament a while back. But now that's over, so is debate season, and I can update SO much more :) Thank you, everyone who read my story, favorited it, put it on story alert, or reviewed. :D ****This chapter is mostly a memoir of everything that has happened in Buffy so far (ergo, MAJOR spoilers if you haven't seen all of Buffy yet). I hope you find it as fantastic as Kennedy does. There will be cursing- I rated this T for a reason! **Also, this chapter turned out to be shockingly long, sorry? The next probably won't be as long, but you never know. Okay, enough babbling. Chappie No. 5!

Kennedy, the new Slayer, was sprawled across the couch comfortably, listening intently to Buffy and Spike's tale. It was an exciting one, weaved with intricate secrets and ploys, one laced with tragedy and sorrow, yet alight with triumph and joy. As the two vampires told their story, the rest of the gang joined them. They laughed, they cried, they gasped, they sighed. The tale began with Spike's beginnings, and these were stories not oft told, some Buffy had never even heard.

"I was born in England, as you've probably guessed, in 1852. My name was William Pratt. My childhood was quite normal and drab, but I did have a cat, a fine blue-gray feline that I named Ice. I wasn't exactly the most appealing bloke, personality wise, as I was a real simpering git, and so Ice was really my only companion. I found her on the street when she was a kitten, and a skinny little thing, she was. I took her home and made my mother let me keep her. I fed her up and she would cuddle like no tomorrow. But she was, in essence, my cat. Ice was the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes upon - other than Buffy.

"Well, years passed, as they do, and when I was twenty-eight, I died. I had just been rejected by the woman I loved, Cecily Addams, and I was wandering the streets. That's when Drusilla found me. Drusilla was the craziest bint you'd ever meet, and there are some pretty bizarre people out there. She was like that all because of Angelus. I'll tell you about that wanker in a minute. But anyway, Dru saw me, and she just so happened to want a little playmate. So she changed me. Sired me into what I am. Dru was what Angelus considered to be an accomplishment of his, his own personal masterpiece, if you will. " Spike said wryly, torn between pity for the human Drusilla and the disgust he had for her (and himself alongside her) now, with his soul.

"You see, Drusilla, as a human, had the potential to be a saint, as she had had the sight. Angelus, sadistic, vile, blighter that he was, drove her to insanity. He tortured and killed her family until she tried to go to a covenant. Then he sired her. She was completely mad even as a vampire, and me, her, Angelus, and Darla terrorized Europe and Asia, until..." He trailed off, swallowing. "Until Angelus killed a gypsy, and was cursed with the return of his soul. Now the poof goes by Angel, and he went off to brood. So me and Dru split away from Darla after a brief encounter with Dracula (wanker still owes me eleven pounds).

"I killed two slayers, one in China, the other in New York. Then me and Dru came here, to kill Buffy." He smirked, thinking about what his former self would have said about the situation right now.

"Alright, my turn, Spike!" Buffy chastised, launching into her own story. "I was born in LA, called to be the Slayer at fifteen. I was a complete valley girl, popular and a cheerleader and whatnot. My first watcher was Merrick, and he was no bag of cookies. He was a great Watcher and all, but geez, he was about as bad as Snyder- and that's saying something. He, well, died when we fought Lothos..." Buffy trailed off, remembering her stern old Watcher that she had nevertheless grown attached to before he passed away. She shook her head and continued with slightly watery eyes. "So I moved here, with Mom and Dawn, after my mom and dad split up. And after I burnt down a building.

"Even though we moved to Sunnydale to get away from all the trouble-making, turns out this is a Hellmouth. Giles, then the librarian at Sunnydale High, became my second Watcher, once he found out that I was the Slayer. I also met Angel (whom you know from Spike's charming introduction)" she said on a side note with a half-hearted glare at her sire. "He was... mysterious and-"

Spike cut in scathingly, "Broody and a bloody ponce?"

Buffy merely rolled her eyes and continued with her story. "Mysterious and charming." Spike snorted, which Buffy ignored with a valiant effort. She might have feelings for him, but he could still be incredibly annoying. Best to drag out the part about Angel, then. "I didn't know he was a vampire, at first. Then I thought he was trying to attack my mother, and he spilled the metaphorical beans. Such a strange metaphor "Spilling the beans" for telling secrets? Doesn't make a bunch of sense. But I digress. I found out that Angel was a vampire, cursed with a soul by Gypsies. I fell in love with him, and him with me.

"Then this jerk shows up, soulless, with Drusilla attached to him at the hip. They plot to kill me (obviously they were unsuccessful) and end up with Spike in a wheelchair and Drusilla not doing too fantastic either, not that I care. But then Angel lost his soul when we- um, did it because he experienced a moment of true happiness." Buffy paused, blushing madly at this while Spike twisted his finger around a bit of thread mindlessly.

"He joined forces with Spike and Drusilla, starts sleeping with Dru, and develops a plan to end the world. Spike, who wasn't happy with woman-theifing Angelus, and all to happy to remain in this world and drink blood from humans for the rest of eternity, in turn became my ally, even though he was still "evil". Once we thwarted Angelus, Spike and Dru went to Brasil or somewhere. I spent the summer in L.A. doing some work as a waitress. When I came back, Angel had returned from hell, re-souled, and I helped him get better. And he did. He got better, and we dated some, though we kept it strictly out of the bed if you know what I mean. Yet he left for L.A. anyway, like the prick I wish he was, so I could have a "normal life". You see how that turned out.

"But Dru left Spike for a Chaos demon, and he came back here. Hammered like no tomorrow, he kidnaps Willow and tries to make her perform a love spell to get her back. We, of course, save Willow and he kind of goes into hiding while Wills and I start college at U.C. Sunnydale."

Spike sighs and tells her, "Then these blokes from this military organization, The Initiative or some rot, fuckin snatch me and take me to their big scary underground lab. They stick this microchip in my head that prevents me from hurting any human. With a rather well-thought-out plan, for me, if I do say so myself, I escape. But I don't know at that point that they've, for lack of a better term, neutered me. I get Willow to invite me into her and Buffy's dorm, and I try to attack her. I can't though, 'cause of that bleedin' chip. I hide out for a while before going to Giles and the other "Scoobies" to try and get some money for information on the Initiative. Instead, they chain me to a bathtub." Spike gives Buffy a look, and she returns it with a rather abashed gaze.

"What were we supposed to do?" Spike opens his mouth to reply, but the door opens and Giles, Xander, and Willow re-enter.

Xander looks at Kennedy, obviously absorbed in the conversation, and inquires, "What's going on Buff?"

Spike answers for her with a small smile. "Spillin' our life histories, ain't we?" Apparently piquing the newcomers' interests, as they sit down to listen.

"Well, I'm chained in the bathtub, not saying anything in case once I give away my information, I get staked, you know? Giles and Willow come up with the idea to do some mojo on me, some kind of truth spell." He starts retelling before Buffy breaks in.

"Yeah. In the meantime, though, Willow is really broken up over Oz, a guy she used to date. Or rather, a werewolf she used to date. He, like Angel, moved off for Willow's own good. Bullshit, in my opinion. So Willow, in a heart-broken, drunken mess, decides to do a spell, to have her will done. She doesn't realize it worked until some really bad stuff starts happening." Buffy fills the other Slayer in with some background information.

Giles adds in, "I went blind, when Willow made an offhand remark about me not seeing anything, metaphorically. Her spell took it literally."

"And I became a demon magnet!" Xander puts in, while Willow remains embarrassedly silent.

"I proposed to Buffy." Spike says while Buffy dissolves into a fit of giggles, remembering the ridiculousness of it all and how it compared to the rest of all that had happened since. "Willow said something about if my escaping from Giles was so important then Buffy and I should just get married, and well, that happened. We were most hysterically engaged, since we each hated each others very cores then." To only Buffy, he said cheekily, "I still have the ring, love. I kept it as a memento when you threw it at my head. " Buffy blushed, and Xander laughed loudly. They all heard what he said, even if it as only directed towards the other vampire.

Buffy moved on with the story, still a little flustered. "After that fiasco, Spike became mostly an annoying stalker, still trying to kill me."

"I almost, did it, too. I got a shotgun and was going to blast your brains out when I saw you crying on the porch that night, after..." He trailed off, not wanting to reveal any of her secrets. She merely nods and signals for him to continue."After Dawn ran away. But that was around the same time when I started to fall in love with her."

Clearing his throat to lessen the awkwardness of the moment (unsuccessfully), Spike continued. "Dawn ran away because she found out that she was a Key. She had been sent by some monks; not a real person, but history had been rewritten to include her, so none of us knew until the evil hell bitch Glory showed up. We found Dawn, of course, but we were all pretty shaken up. Some of Glory's dim-witted minions kidnapped me, thinking that I was the key."

Kennedy held up a hand for the first time, and asked curiously, "Why'd they think you were the Key?"

It was Spike's turn to go a little red. "I kind of..got m'self a robot that looked exactly like Buffy when she didn't want anything to do with me. Glory knew the Key was someone close to Buffy, and human. And, with the robot, Buffy-bot's, behaviour, they of course thought it was me, even though I'm a _vampire_!" He expressed his dislike for Jinx and the other warty minions.

"They tortured him for information. Terribly tortured." Buffy took over. "I could hardly see his face over all the cuts and bruises by the time we rescued him, even though it was originally my intention to kill him. I never dreamed he would withstand the torture- or even try."

Spike interjected, "I loved you, Buffy." Realizing how tense the atmosphere had gotten, he tried to put in some humour. "I told Glory the key was Bob Barker." Xander laughed awkwardly, and even Giles cracked a grin. "Anyway, after Glory figured out that Dawn was the key to open a portal to her own personal hell dimension, and seized her accordingly (after one hell of a chase), Buffy ended up killing herself to save the world.

Buffy looked down at her feet, remembering again. "It was a terrible time. Buffybot stood in her place to keep Sunnyhell from being over-run with demons, but it wasn't the same. I missed her so much..." Now Spike's eyes got slightly teary, and he pretended to sneeze so he could wipe his eyes. He continued in a lightly more croaky voice, "But Willow brought her back." With a respectful nod to the redhead, he fell silent.

The newer vampire smiled falsely. "Yeah. Spike and I had a thing, and after a couple of hilarious, sometimes musical, adventures, we're back to the present. Eh, Randy? " She grinned, using the name Spike though was his own when Willow's forgetting spell had gone wrong.

Playing along, he smiled back. "Damn straight, Joan. But you forgot how I traveled to Africa and got my ass kicked repeatedly and almost died to get my soul."

Still smiling despite the rather serious change of topic, she dipped her head. "That too."


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Even though I should _really _be working on my other stories right now... Well, an idea came into my head on the bus for _this_ one, and I cannot deny the voices...Ha ha isn't that a creepy thought? I meant it in correlation with writing inspirations though. The voices do not tell me to kill anyone (in real life xD). ANYWAY, thank you all who read the last chapter, reviewed it, or put it or me on any kind of alert. You are very much appreciated. The first portion of this chapter was only meant to be an intro, but it kind of turned into a whole chapter on its own... It was also meant to be more serious than it turned out to be, but whatever. *Also, before some of you go yelling at me, the things listed below are the character's thoughts and beliefs, and they do not necessarily reflect my own. LASTLY, this chapter is quite short, but it kind of balances out the last chapter, which was strangely long. I wish I could make this longer, but I don't know how to without ruining the chapter itself. I'll definitely figure it out a day or two after I publish this though. Though that is of no use to you whatsoever... Anyway, the next chapter will go back to the real story, and will hopefully be a more balance-y length.  
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**The church was dim, the only light coming from the few flickering torches on the walls. The dappled light they gave created misshapen shadows that stretched and loomed like monsters lurking in the dark. His steps echoed slightly as he walked forward with an easy confidence, even in this place. The high-vaulted arches soared high above your head, and the colorful tapestries hung from the walls, more detailed than any you had seen before. This was the farthest thing from your natural habitat; it was so intrinsically good; or so you would have believed, once upon a time. Now stripped of feeble human emotions, you saw that the church was merely a house where people could_ _quell their fear of being alone in the world. But if "God" existed, you wouldn't, right? You didn't know why crosses burned your skin, but it couldn't have anything to do with Christianity or Catholicism itself; If a Buddhist held the cross to your face, it would still burn. _

_"Angelus?" You called in a somewhat low voice. He turned his head, long strands of hair shielding his eyes, yellow with hate, from view. "I don't like this." It was true; being in such a sanctum made you uneasy, as if you were crossing a line to where a beast greater than you waited. _

_Your grand-sire only laughed mirthlessly. "Fine, William. You stay here and look at the pretty pictures while I smear my hands with the blood of the pure, the innocent." He gave a devilish grin and stalked off, not caring if you followed or not. Something about this place made you feel awkward, nervous, queasy; there was no way you could feed anyhow. To add to your feeling of incompleteness, Drusilla and Darla were left behind on this trip. Drusilla's presence could always ease your distress, but she was not here now. You crossed your arms and looked around at the architecture of the building you never should have entered.  
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_"Sanctuary!" A voice bellowed, the low and throaty growl of a man who has passed his prime but has a ways to go before moving on. You jumped before chastising yourself on not being concentrated enough to pick up the human scent that was so clear, now. A man, a priest, approached in ceremonial garb. The reason for his dress was not apparent- what was it, two in the morning? "Begone, filthy blood drinker. You are not welcome in the house of God! Sanctuary!" The priest brandished a cross, his hands trembling ever so slightly. _

_Acting mostly on curiosity, you ask, "Why not?" You know the answer he is going to give, but making him struggle to support his reasoning might be entertaining before you had to kill him. _

_"Foolish questions you ask, vampire!" The old man spat out the word as if it were a crawling insect, poisonous but easily quashed. "You are evil, soulless, a demon, a drinker of the innocents' life. You bring only pain and suffering, and God's love will never reach you. So leave this place. You cannot harm me, not while I hold a piece of that which is holy."_

_You smile, a little. As if one small cross could really protect a whole person. "What makes me evil, exactly?"_

_"You kill without reason. Now do not patronize me any further! Leave!" He said, beads of sweat appearing on his brow. _

_You frown and shake your head. Such ignorance! "Mr. Priest, have you ever eaten beef or pig without being within an inch of starvation? Judging by the round little belly you have, I'd wager I'm right in saying that you have. Therefore, you have caused death, without true reason too. are you evil, Mr. Priest?"_

_Mr. Priest, as you have now named him, flushes, either with anger or embarrassment. "It is not the same. I was speaking of human life!"_

_"Oh, getting defensive, are we?" You chuckle. "Even if we assume that human life is of more value than animal life, though I can hardly tell the difference except that human blood is, shall we say, tastier, weren't a bunch of humans the ones that crucified you high and mighty Christ? you know, nailed him to a cross and let him die?"_

_It is a moment for Mr. Priest answers in an angry tone, "He was resurrected, he didn't really die. And He forgave them."_

_"Alright, why doesn't he forgive me then?" You reply, fast as an arrow. "And moreover, if killing's okay as long as the person comes back, then am I off the hook if I, you know, change them after I drink some of their blood? Does that make it okay?"_

_Mr. Priest, flustered and annoyed, snaps, "No, it doesn't. And God will never forgive you. You are still a monster, and you always will be."_

_Angelus appears, silent as the night that falls upon the world, and snaps the priest's neck in a swift motion. "Damn straight."_

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_Spike sat up abruptly as a familiar touch grazed his arm. He shook the memory-dream from his mind. "Buffy..." he says as his childe smiles at him.

"You were sleeping. Dreaming, from the way you were muttering and twitching. What did you dream about, huh?" she chirps, curious. _She can never know. _

He blinks expressionlessly. "Nothing, love." Years of experience in lying assure that his eyes don't betray his deception. "Nothing."


End file.
